Perfectly Made Through HIM

Who Am I?

2008-03-04T07:11:00.002-05:00

Who am I?
I am a child.
Your child.
I am a million little gifts
Rolled into one big
Mess of a woman.
Girl.
Mess of a girl.
Trying to find Your hand
Trying to find your face
In the midst of all the confusion.
This mess of a girl
Trying to bring up thereto down here.
So that I can spare
Others the hurt and the pain.
Trying to bring your grace
To this lonely place
Where the thief comes
To kill and destroy.
Not my will
But yours be done.
Im finished with the fun
and games of this life.

Who am I?
I am yours.
Take me as You find me
I will not conform
I will not transform
any longer to the patterns
Of this world.
But instead i will find my peace
I will find my rest
In the shadows of your wings.
I will be your hands
And your Feet,
Walking alongside you.
Trying to show the world who
You are, and what your son
The one and only one.
Did to cover our sin
and shame
and guilt.
How he was beaten
and bloody.
mocked
and ridculed.
And nailed to a cross,
saving the lost.
So that we could be found.
forgotten by the crowd
Denied by his own.
The seed that he'd sown.
And with his final breath,
He spoke the words
That have grasped my heart
"Not mine, but Your will be done"

Who am I?
I am your servant.
A maker of nations.
And singer of songs.
One who longs
To know your heart,
and love the things you love.
Seeking from above,
knowledge and wisdom.
Your kingdom come.
On Earth as it is in Heaven.
I am a peace maker,
artistic creator
of dreams.
Dreams that only You
Can make come true.
Dreams too big to dream
Yet, everyday I scream,
for your guidance
In a silent voice I scream.
Praying selfish prayers,
praying unworthy prayers.
But I fall down on my knees
Offering all of me.
All of my mistakes
All of my failures.
Falling flat on my Face,
So that it is your grace,
That must help me rise again.

Who am I?
I am Yours.

Summer. Love. =D.

2007-06-28T01:27:00.001-04:00

God = Amazing.
So umm.
summer has been wonderful.
Straight A's on the report card.
girlfriend days with Lauren.
Silverhawks game.
The Cedar Point with raquel
Rhapsody and Green.
And Crazy nights with Raquel.
Lazy Days around the house.
Babysitting.
Playing on the lake.
Taking way to many pictures.
Messing around at laurens house.
And eating pity cream after church.
Going to graduation ceremonies,
and graduation parties,
and wondering what the future will hold.
Staring at the sky,
wondering when the world got so perfect.
Driving all over town just because I can.
Spending hours at the mall,
with one of my bestest friends.
Checking out boys,
buying new clothes.
Jamming out in the car,
with the sunroof open,
windows down,
radio's blasting.
Swimming in Rockys pool
and Playing guitar hero.
Sneaking out,
and watching movies =]
getting faces painted,
getting pictures with Cute boys,
and Getting numbers,
we thought were unreachable.
Indy with a really good friend,
and spending time with family.
Now, im off.
Getting ready to begin
The biggest journey,
yet, of my life.
And I will miss all my friends dearly.
I will miss the ones that i've had.
And the new ones that I've made.
This summer has absolutly been the best.

Love you
=D.

Schools out

2007-06-03T18:01:00.000-04:00

The title about says it all.

Im excited, and a bit worried.
Things have changed. And Matt and I are no longer together. And stuff hurts. But God is pulling me through. He always has and Im thankful for that.
But this summer is going to be interesting.
The countdown to Mexico is on.
26 days.
agh.

its almost here.
and im not prepared.
and my emotions are all over the place.
But it is going to be sooo. wonderful. and amazing and great!!

Thanks to all of you who have sponsored me.
It means soooo much to me. You don't even know.
Thanks to all of you who plan on coming to the garage sale. and/or Ice cream social!
You are all appreciated.

yay! summer.

Prom '07

2007-05-14T19:36:00.000-04:00

This is Kasie In Love.

The night was Amazing. Perfect in everyway. even the two times when i tripped and landed flat on my back. Perfect. Even when Matt forgot the Tickets. Perfect. Even when someone I knew showed up in the same dress as me. Perfect.

Dinner was Wonderful. Pictures were great. My corsage was goregous. As was my date. I was His princess and Him my prince charming.

The dance was Fantasmic. We danced basically all night. People looked absolutly Insane Hot. Everyone was beautiful. And thats my favorite part. Everyone is Pretty on Prom night. You look past your little cliques of people. You look past little arguments, little disagreements, And you just watch in Awe as these all of these little ugly ducklings (myself included) step out of their shell and Shine just as God created them to shine. Even if its just for one night.

Seriously If you have not met my boyfriend. Get on it. He is so ridiculously amazing its not even funny. Yes, i may be biased, but once you get to know him, you begin to notice what I see every day. I wrote about him the day after our sixth month. But just a week after he went all out for our six month he did it again for prom. This guy makes me feel goregous on my good days, my bad days, and every other day in between. The capacity he has for Love is gigantic. I thank him for making the night so perfect.

And God. He has blessed me with everything. Including the money to buy a prom dress when money was tight. The best friends in the world to give me moral support. The most amazing mom to help me out and leave me alone when i was stressed. A wonderful dad to go take pictures with me. The God that saved a wretch like me. The God who tells me every day im worth it and I Matter. That no matter what Any boy thinks of me, He is bigger than all those boys and He thinks I am Goregous. And thats all that matters. And Lastly, I thank God for giving me the most wonderful boyfriend, basically ever. For giving him the love to love me. For giving him the courage to break the mold of Sex crazed males and be his own man, A man that treats his girlfriend with respect and devotion. Thank you God for a wonderful night. Thank you for revealing your beauty to me, and letting me be a part of the beauty. You are bigger than I could ever imagine.

The night was

Perfect.

Thanks

2007-05-08T19:05:00.000-04:00

This weekend was rough. As many of you know. So this is a thank you.

Matt- Thank you for making me feel like the most beautiful girl in the world, all the time. Whether it be with all the roses, and flowers. The kisses on the forehead. When you say it, or just when you grab my hand and want to hold it. Thank you for letting me 'rant' on Thursday night. Thank you for Holding me on Friday. Not trying to make it better with words, but just letting me be in your arms, and not letting go. Thank you for letting me come over on saturday night, and just be with you. And feel the power that God has given you, being put into me. Thank you as Ted would like to call it for being my Rock. For being my support system in everything I do.

Ted and Angela Bryant- Thanks for listening. Thanks for being there. Thanks for praying and praying and praying. Thanks for understanding. Thank you for bringing 3 beautiful children into the world that i can hold and play with. They make me feel Alive. Thank you for being an example. For showing me how I want my future relationship with my husband to look like. For showing me what I want Matt and I's relationship to look like now.

Katie- Thanks for being the first ear. Thanks for asking.

Corey- Thanks for not having the words to say. Thanks for not pretending like everything was going to be okay. Thanks for not pretending like it wasn't going to hurt. Thanks for not pretending like I couldn't get Mad, And i couldn't be upset. Thanks for being you, and not changing. Thanks for the Text on Friday.

Lauren- Thanks for listening. Thanks for hugging me. Thanks for making me call Matthew. Thanks for Asking. Thanks for pointing me toward God. Thanks for hanging out with me, and not letting me get lonely.

Sarah Baker- Thanks for listening. Thanks for saying you want to have your way with me. Thanks for wanting to be with me. Thanks for reminding Matt that he can't stay all night and you can!

The rest of you. Thank you for being an Ear. Thank you for praying for me.

The biggest thanks of all. GOD. Thank you for Listening Major. Thanks for speaking through People,songs, words. Thank you for letting me cry on the inside, and on the outside. Thank you for giving me Grace. Thank you for keeping me Happy. Thank you for giving me all these people to talk to, to be with. Thank you for giving me Matt to be my earthly rock while you are our heavenly rock. Thank you for giving me patience. Thank you for giving me forgiviness, not only for myself but for others. Thanks for giving me Love.

=]

6 months

2007-05-04T06:39:00.000-04:00

About a year and a half ago I Met a boy. Tall, skinny, cute, with and great heart and a great mind. I don't remeber how i met him exactly. Maybe it was at camp, right before my ninth grade year. Maybe it was because we both served and continue to serve in the All stars. Maybe it was because I decided that he was cute, and I was going to get to know him. We started talking about only God knows what. And really only God does know, because Him and I both forget. Then we talked about friends and school and Family. As time went on we talked about God, and relationships, Mistakes that we've made. We would talk about everything. Without realizing it over the course of a year we became really close friends. He was there when i wasn't accepted for Mexico, and then there when I found out I really was. I've been there for breakups, and egging him on to go to prom.

Six months ago today this tall, skinny, cute boy asked me to be his girlfriend. one of the greatest desicions i've ever made in my life. Not a particularly hard one. Hes kind, cute, and has a passion for Christ and People that compares to Mother Theresa. He will be kind with anybody anywhere. Leaving extra tips and a note for our waitresses that seem to be having a bad night. being there for all of his friends when they need it. Going to his sisters concerts and sports events. Coming to all of my stuff, and supporting me in everything I do. Driving down to see his brother. Etc. He cares for me. He points me towards God. He lets me cry on his shoulder. He makes me feel like im beautiful, a princess, that I matter. He's been there through alot of my SAND as Dr. Bob would call it. He's showed me Love, and Family, forgiveness, compassion, mercy, grace. He has Died and He no longer lives but Christ lives in Him. And through him. Hes going off to college in a few months and I can't wait to see what God is going to use him for there. And i can't wait to see what God brings for this relationship.

Thanks for an AMAZING six months.

I LOVE YOU.

Grace: a letter

2007-05-03T16:48:00.000-04:00

Jesus,

How did you find the Grace. To love the sinners, and tax collectors, the prostitutes, and pharisees, the hypocrites, and most of all those who murdered you. Those who beat you and put you up on the cross. Those who mocked you and scorned you. Laughed at you and denied your name. How did you find the grace, to love a wretch like me. A screwed up teen with a beat up heart. One that trys and trys but can never try well enough. Thinks she understands when they say it isn't about actions, but never feels as though she never measures up to the 'christian' way of life. How?

I can't even do it with one person. How do you manage to do it with the World?

Can you give me that grace. Not the understanding that I am free, that you love me Jesus. But can you give me the grace to let others be free. To remind me that you love them as you love me. Can you give me the grace to forgive and keep on forgiving, even when it gets hard. Can you?

Will you show me your will. Will you show me why this hurts, why this doesn't go away. Will you teach me something from this. Will you?

I believe that you can, I believe that you will, I believe in your How's and Why's. Jesus, but help me believe in myself. That im not the one thats failing. That this isn't my problem, and if i keep on forgiving, i can be free. truely be free.

I WANT TO BE FREE.

Wassup James

2007-04-29T21:47:00.000-04:00

In Mexico we studied James. A lot. We read about him in quiet time, we talked about him in Small groups, and then we hit it as a team, diving face first into the life of James, jesus' brother.

For the past three weeks we have been studing James At Lifeline. Its a good series for us. At this age, we connect with a guy who probably felt a little like he was never good enough, could never compare to his brother. We can also Learn from Him because through it all, he didn't seep into Jealousy and bitterness, he handled it with the Grace that god had given him and Hit the floor in Prayer all the time.

Week one.
Learning about James. Does my life reflect Christ?
at church
at home
at school.
in the car by my self.
in my room.
With the boyfriend.
What is your problem?
Do you have people that want to be around you because you are a Christ Follower and you have something that people want to have in them?

Week two. Gossip.
This is a big one.
Think. Is it.....true,helpful,inspiring,nessicary,kind.
Ask for help.
What you say flows directly from what is in your heart.
Am I a Person of Character??

Week three. Im IN.
We are saved by Grace but our salvation will be shown by our actions.
It is how we choose, with what Heart we choose to do things that show people that we love HIM.
Step out. don't just believe Follow. Listen to God.
Am i willing to get int he wheel barrow?
Am i willing to step out for a friend?
Am i willing to listen to God's plan, even if it makes me uncomfortable?
Am i willing to take back the Hinge?
Faith with Deeds.
Come follow me.....be a fisher of Men.
Find your calcutta.-mother theresa.
Are you sick of Christianity? become a Christ-Follower. A revolutionary.

IM IN

Hey again

2007-04-29T06:37:00.000-04:00

It has been awhile, but, I figured with mexico on the way, and this blog's address on all of those 100 support letters I sent out, I better dive back in to the blogging realm.

Not much new happening. Went and saw a not so good movie on friday, but i was with friends, so it wasn't that bad. Yesterday, I helped one of my friends get ready for her prom, I probably used a quarter of a tank of gas, driving her everywhere and running to get all of her stuff. But in the end it was worth it, because she was So, so, so, goregous. Taking pictures of her and her date last night, made me realize that my prom is only in 2 weeks. Now im sort of frieking out. I still don't have all my accesories, and I get a trial up do for my hair next weekend, hopefully i won't have to change styles. But i'm really, really excited for it! I love being able to act like a princess.

Mexico.
Last summer as many of you all now i went down to Monterrey for a week with my Church's youth group Lifeline. There was about 32 of us, and we had a life-defining time. I say life-defining because It didn't really change our lives per-si, it just shaped us to be who we are today.In the Buddhist culture they use the word Anatta, atta meaning soul, anatta meaning no soul. They don't nessicarily believe that there is no soul, they believe that the soul is never the same from one moment to the next. They compare it to a wave. A wave is singular, and as it is singular IT crashes onto the beach in One, It retains the same shape from where it is created to when It crashes on the beach. Yet at no two points in time are any of its water molecules in the exact same position as they were before. They believe like the wave, that the soul is ever-changing. And thats what happened last year in Mexico, my soul was shaped and defined in a much greater way than if I just stayed home and did the normal.

This summer i am going back to Monterrey for a month. The journey will be long. It will be difficult. and It will be a blessing, and a reward. Maybe it will be as life-defining as it was last year, maybe I will just find freedom once again in who I am. Whatever happens though is part of what God has in plan for the bigger picture. He's using this trip to shape my piece to fit Perfectly into His puzzle.

My desicion was an easy one. Coming back last year i told my mother, "they have this internship program, where you go for a month and do what we did this week. I want to go." She sort of blew it off, one of those, 'she's on one of her spiritual high's again, once school starts it will pass by and i won't have to hear about the internship again until she comes back next year. Then desicion day. At musical dress rehearsal, i got a voicemail from Melissa Briener saying that I was accepted into the internship program. Im not kidding im pretty sure that I screamed. I jumped around. I giggled. It was all i could do litterally not to do backflips right there on the stage. I called Corey, I called Jen, I called Ruby. Then i went home and Told my parents. "You mean you acutally signed up?", was my mom's intial response. Second, "Wow, what am i going to do you're going to be gone for a month?" That is where my journey begins. Although it began at birth, this is where the old chapter of my life comes to a close and a new one starts to begin.

♥

on a side note, I am so ready for school to be out!!!!

Him.

2006-12-20T16:00:00.000-05:00

Seasons are changeing and Waves are crashing and Stars are falling all for us.
Days grow longer and nights go shorter, i can show you i'll be the one.
I will never let you fall, i'll stand up with you forever.
I will be there for you through it all, even if saving you sends me to heaven.

I dont want him to be perfect...I want him to laugh at me...
Trip me, then help me back up...Pick me up and throw me in the pool...
Make me watch football for hours...
Take me to the arcade...and beat me at air hockey
Love me for the person I am...

&& She said "Your crazy Baby"
and he said "Only for you!"

that night, we danced,
we took pictures, we laughed,
we kissed.
the whole world knew we were in love that night.

your the boy my friends will always know as, 'the one she talked about constantly'

Love: the irresistable desire
to be irresitably desired.

<3

Im in

2006-10-31T14:39:00.000-05:00

I came across the post written by a major influece in my life.

coreymann.

And then I came across a post of my own

A reminder to myself.

Revolutionary:
1.of, pertaining to, characterized by, or of the nature of a revolution, or a sudden, complete, marked change:
2.radically new or innovative; outside or beyond established procedure, principles, etc
5.a revolutionist

Thats what i want to be.

So corey......

IM IN.

<3

A midsummer's night dream

2006-10-31T14:32:00.000-05:00

And the other drama that ensues.

The play is officially Over. No more rehearsals. No more lines. No more dances.
The performance was Perfect though. Granted there were some minore mistakes, It was probably the best show any of us has ever done in highschool.

Life has been busy. busy. busy.
Homework. chores. friends.
And a new relationship on the horizon.

God has been there. through it all.

Im really looking forward to the next month.

<3

Wicked in Chicago at the end of november!!

The Real Me

2006-10-08T22:03:00.000-04:00

So this past month has been crazy.

with all the fairy stuff and everything else.

But this weekend helped ALOT.

Ted spoke tonight on our friends and being the real you.
And now I have to re-learn how to be the real me. I have to figure out who the real me is. Because for 2 years i've been Me. with a boy.

Now im learning how to be Me without the boy. and its hard. And i'm not strong enough to handle it. But God is getting me by. keeping me busy. Helping me not think about it. Cause i don't think the boy is over with me. and i'm not going to say im completly over the boy. That takes time.

But im learning how to be me without the boy. So that if getting over it is what it takes I can be ready.

<3

How i feel

2006-09-24T22:10:00.000-04:00

[[Why did I let myself believe
Miracles could happen
Cause now I have to pretend
That I don't really care
I thought you were my fairytale
A dream when I'm not sleeping
A wish upon a star
Thats coming true
But everybody else could tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
When there was me and you

I swore I knew the melody
That I heard you singing
And when you smiled
You made me feel
Like I could sing along
But then you went and changed the words
Now my heart is empty
I'm only left with used-to-be's
Once upon a song

Now I know your not a fairytale
And dreams were meant for sleeping
And wishes on a star
Just don't come true]]

I wish i didn't like boys.
They make everything difficult.

Listening

2006-09-22T17:34:00.000-04:00

I have recently disovered the art of Listening.

With me thats an enormous feat. But i'm sure its hard for other people too.

Today i got the chance to talk to one of the custodians at our school. His names "mo". He's the funniest, oldest, possibly biggest, middle eastern Guy you will ever meet. Most students don't talk to Mo. He's usually sort of camouflague with his blue janitor's uniform on.But i like to talk to Mo. He always says nice things like "have a good day" or "Hope your weekend was well" and its funny in that middle eastern accent of his.

Mo grew up in Damascus Syria. Ruled by a dictator Mo and his family had no freedoms. So when he was in Highschool he fled to a country in Europe. That country was a communist country so Mo had almost no more freedoms than when he lived in Damascus. So they gave him a choice. "you follow our country or you leave" and Mo left. He came to America. Got his Visa and went to college to be a lab technician. He has three kids. All three graduated from Memorial. the highschool that he lives to keep clean. They have one granddaughter who Mo loves very much. Although He hardly ever sees her. Mo also told us about his love of travel. Hes been to Alot of countries. and he's been to every continent except for Austrailia and Antartica. And when he retires, "very soon", Mo hopes to travel to Austrailia.

Mo talked to Us about the importance of prayer and said that in Syria he was charged for a crime. His lawyers told him that there was no way out of the three year sentence. Yet Mo prayed and prayed and prayed and surprisingly The Judge listened to him and dismissed his case. Mo accredits the whole thing to God.

Its cool just listening to people and finding out about thier life. Its something i want to do more often. Its good just to sit with someone and listen to them without making them feel like your rushed and need to be somewhere.

I learned alot from Mo today : about listening, and prayer, and how hard life was during the time he was my age.

<3

Mexico Video

2006-09-12T17:44:00.000-04:00

Heres the New Mexico video thanks to Corey.

Mexico 2006

Its great!.

<3

Baptism '06

2006-09-10T20:32:00.000-04:00

So baptism was Today.

Got up at 7. Dragged around my room. Threw on some clothes. Threw up my hair. Looked half decent for "throwing" myself together.

Had my mommy drop my tooshie off at Church where I hung out in the Hier Force room until all the little kiddies came.Danced. Danced somemore. and then finally danced one last song.

Went upstairs and slept on my anatomy book in the atrium until i heard Trace say chastity belts and then i was up and having a laughing fit. Decided i needed coffee badly. and a cinomin( i cant spell today) roll. Sat with evan bronkema. Talked to Courtney. Went downstairs and Danced somemore. Talked to Kristi. And lauren. Then led 2 and 3rd grade small group downstairs. Danced more. then Hung out with Matt, Jacob, and Beccah. (the cool rendell).

Left and went with Matt to Quizno's for lunch. Had good disscussion. ate good food. laughed a little bit. Oh and we talked about fantasy football. Someone Please explain.

then we headed to life action retreat center. and got a Spot. Right out in the open. then it rained. Steady downpour. 60 degrees. it was great! A bunch of cool people got baptized. Like Little miss Stephani Arnett and Adam Rost. and Kira. Hung out with Micah. Talked about something but i forgot. Ate food. talked to C. Mann. Ate more food. Walked. Drove home with Jen.

We had good disscussion too. Boy disscussion. It would almost be easier to have a boyfriend.

Came home. Took a long, HOT. shower. and now i'm trying to get homework done. Today was great! People professing their Love for God. And the fact that they want to change their lives and be new people. Awesome!

Hope you all have a great week!.

Lifeline starts Sunday

Help!?!?!

2006-09-01T21:51:00.000-04:00

i'm reading this book called irresistable revolution.*shane claiborne*

It's good. i like it Alot. maybe not some of the things he says. but most of them. Talks about the difference between church and "the church". Haves a chapter about him going to Callcutta India and meeting and seeing Jesus in the lepors who lived in the lepor colony. I liked that part Alot. Made me want to go back to mexico. Made me think about Mexico. and all the kids and the families and how i could see jesus in the faces of the fathers who were there and the mothers who cried and the kids who laughed and played Go! Fish with me for hours. It reminded me of how i've never felt closer to Jesus than when i was handing out bibles and food house to house. knowing that Through me God was feeding the hungry. physically with the food and spritually with the bibles.

My favorite part of the whole book so far is when he talks about how we always do things. We always send money. We always give clothes to the salvation army, and toys to the homeless shelter, and food to the food banks. We always give to organizations. and that makes us feel good makes us think that we are doing something to help and we are. But he talks about how when we do that were not getting changed. our hearts arn't being changed. Sort of like Rob and how doing things in secret for people changes you. He says to truely have your heart changed you need to experience the poor. he talks about how for some people that doesn't actually mean you give everything away and become poor. but instead you take the food, and clothes, and money to the poor and you talk with them and pray with them and see Jesus in their eyes instead of just writing a check to Feed the Children.

Thinking about Lifeline and the revolutionary theme:

Revolutionary:
1.of, pertaining to, characterized by, or of the nature of a revolution, or a sudden, complete, marked change:
2.radically new or innovative; outside or beyond established procedure, principles, etc
5.a revolutionist

This year is going to be the year i think. The year i step off the sidelines and not only be a part of the revolution but be a revolutionary. To go outside the establish procedure of church and living a "good"life and be changed.

The only problem is : How do i start.? where do i start.? whos going to be there with me when people get upset? (people will get upset. think of the all the revolutions in the past. most resulted in war. and this is a war.) What specifically do I do?

--- before i write this: this is sort of a list of goals shall i say. so keep me accountable. and if i fail at something. its okay i'm only human. (plus i can't drive yet)

I guess i start with me actions. read the bible more. I really want Galations memorized by april and start serving with the sencond saturday thing at the church.
Hopefully my friends will be there with me.
I don't think God really cares what i do. But i don't just want to give money away to some organization. I don't want to give food to the food banks and then leave. I want to look in the eyes of the homeless or the hungry and see Jesus cause thats where he lives. And hopefully in doing so God changes me. If you have any ideas on places to volunteer please tell me. and if you guys want to be a part of this "revolution" and you want to get in the game i'll be happy to have you guys be with me.

I love you All. <3

Quotes

2006-08-24T16:22:00.001-04:00

As some of you know occasionally i like to put up quotes. Here are two that i really like:

love conquers everything. you dont get to choose, you just fall.

& sometimes you get this person who is all wrong & all right at the same time.

& you know that you love them so much except sometimes they drive you completely insane.

no one can explain it & the reason it's so confusing is because its love.

but if love didnt have any challenges, what would be the point?

After reading Pascal's theory:

The Fact that we as humans keep striving for perfection, for truth, (even for a God),

proves that somewhere, Somehow, Sometime, that we were a part of it.

A part of perfection, a part of truth and ultimatly a part of God.

Post!

2006-08-22T19:35:00.000-04:00

A week of school gone by.

Lots of homework so far. Found out i have to disect. 3 or 4 Amazing teachers. A class that lets us have poetry slams with a teacher that supplies the coffee.

I've plugged into that creative writing class. And it could be 3 hours instead of one and a half. For all i care it could be all day. I love it. If i only had creative writing, english and yearbook all day everyday I would be happy.

I'm really missing camp and mexico. I'm missing being part of some sort of team. I missing Amanda like crazy and if she left for IU already i'm going to be quite upset. And i haven't been upset for a while.

I won't buy a word you sold me
I'm going places you never dreamed about
So tired of stupid stories
I'll write a song the world can sing aloud

We'll break the mold they gave us
We're going places they never dreamed about
Jump in and join the chorus
We're writing songs the world can Shout out loud!

A song that the world can sing- A change of pace.

This band is Awesome. And they are playing with showbred in Chicago and i want to go so bad.

<3

Haha so basically i just rambled.

2006-08-13T21:58:00.000-04:00

I had a great vacation..

And i can't believe only 2 more days until school starts or should i say until all the drama starts

This is my desire.
This is my return.
This is my desire.
To be used by YOU!

God- USE me. in the hallway. at the lunch table. In the Gym. On the yearbook. In Drama. On the bus. In class. On my papers. On my tests. with my friends.

God- be there. From the time I wake up until my head stops thinking. When i'm in tough situations. And when Good is all that is coming my way.

God-Give me. Kindness. Compassion. Strength. Courage.Power.Control. Love. Selflessness. Wisdom. ( Not that you haven't already given me EVERYTHING in the world)

God- You are. Amazing. Awesome. Wonderful. powerful. wicked fierce. MY love. Everything.

God- thank you for. my life. my health. my friends. providing me with everything. EVERYTHING.

<3

Life=?

2006-08-04T15:21:00.000-04:00

" 'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we subconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."-- From A RETURN TO LOVE by Marianne Williamson

Matthew5:16

In the same way let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your father in heavenGod tells us to let our light "shine" so that they may see him.

Sometimes I get frustrated that I can't find purpose for my life. Sometimes I get upset because worship is my light and there are things that God doesn't allow me to do because I am a sinner and I'm prideful and God knows that at this point in time I won't honor Him. Which is all I want to do. That's all I want my life to be for. I know that I have to die every day to live for Him. God created us for a purpose. He didn't create us just so that we could take up space, breathe up all the air, and eat all the food. Why let your life boil down to dragging through school.He gave us a brain .Why not use it? Coming home and laying on the couch watching T.V. He gave us the World Why not roam it? And sleep walking day by day doing our useless routines and boring chores. We need to Wake up. Get moving. Show people that God is in us and that we are a part of God. Part of the bigger story. I know that my purpose in life is to do something AMAZING. As is for Your life. Our God is God of Gods, Lord of Lords, the great God, mighty and Awesome(Deut. 10: 17), so do you seriously think that He created us for the monotonous lives we're living?

I've been thinking for the past week about what i can do!. What God wants me to do. And at first i got upset because i don't know what i want to do with my life or what career i want to pursue or any of that. But then i realized that i don't need to know now. And i'm fairly sure God doesn't want me to know now. All I need to know is that there are kids at my school. Kids at the church. Kids in my community that don't know God. And as of right now thats what i need to focus on.

I need to Love people. Love my friends. And be different. Show people that i can lead well. Show people that i get to where i am by doing the right things and in the process Glorifying God.

<3

God:::help me be more like you this school year. I know its going to be hard. Use me!

2006-07-31T23:46:00.000-04:00

Knock, Knock is anybody in Mexico?

God Sure is!

Saturday and Sunday Corey said some pretty profound things especially for the team. So profound God took some of them as a personal challenge to be apparent as our week went on

1. Go fetch the water- He told us all we needed to do all week was "go fetch the water". Go fetch the water AKA. God calling us to do the little things that we may not nessicarily want to do because they are so little and our God's plan is so big that we can't wrap our little minds around the bigger picture he is painting us into. and we need to Fetch the water because without it Gods perfect, complete will cannot be finished!. So...God had some plans up his sleeve! Monday at the Monatial De Amor i started playing with kids but amanda got wore out so God called me to Fetch the water. Literally. I was filling buckets of water and taking them to the cement mixer for the guys! Thursday he also showed up. Corey and i talked on Thursday morning. It was good encouragement. It was a good talk. A talk i would have never expected from a youth pastor. but our God's Amazing at Amazeing us. Then during the pouring of the roof Corey and I together got to fetch water. I think it was one of those moments. One of those moments we both realized what exactly we were doing and what that meant.

2. Stand inside and watch or step out, open the doors wide and let yourselves get drenched in his renewing,merciful,loving rain.- i don't think that was an exact quote. I think alot was added to that when i wrote it in my journal. But Corey had a point. God pours His blessings on us everyday!. every hour! every minute! and what do most of us do. we stand back. take the beautiful scene in. We wait until the downpour stops. even though it never does. And we do nothing with it! We take it for granted and want better ,want more. But why don't we try something!..Why don't we step outside. better yet open up the doors of our homes. our work. our schools. And let not only ourselves get drenched but also the people we love. the people we hate. the people we can't stand. the people we don't even know! And just let them get changed by his rain! Why don't we take as much of it in as we can and then share it with those whose fields are barren and there is drought! So God..in his Power sent us Rain!...Lots of it...Some of you read about it on Corey's blog. But it was so much more than that! Courtney and i danced in it. We rejoiced in it! We stood in it and got soaked to the bone.&& yet we still watched as people stood inside. behind the doors. Huddling together afraid to get wet! And so many people are like that. They are afraid of what would really happen if they let God change them. If they let God use them. They are afraid. And i'll admit it I was there once so your not alone. I used to hate the rain. Hate when i Got the least bit wet! but I know from experience. You do it once and you'll never want to quit.

3.The bigger picture- As corey and i were once again fetching water for Douglas we were walking together and there among the cracks was a puzzle piece. I told corey it was sort of like a penny. He laughed!. It was a good day! God and His glory ultimatly showed through then too especially when it was hot. early. and we were already weary

4. Go Fish- Do any of you know what its like to Humble yourselves before God! If i didn't know before i sure found out this week! Thursday at our pool party God had other plans!. It was a good thing He did. I didn't feel as though the Kids were being as loved on. (all the kids in the pool && 8 or nine students sitting inside the palapa) So God again sends another batch of rain. Ultimatly putting us all in the palapa. A little girl who tried to thank me for putting her bathing suit out to dry (in the rain i might add) and i started to hang out! All week i had been hoping to do the Big things. Pouring cement. painting. digging a trench. So God decided He would use thursday to Humble me before Him. This girl was probably about 8 -or- 9. There really wasn't much to do especially since i can't talk in any spanish. So she pulled out the deck of Go Fish cards. And i tell you what i haven't played Go Fish probably since i was six. And i have never loved the game more than when i was playing with that girl. we played in complete silence! i don't know what she was thinking especially since she beat me every time! At first I didn't care if she won so i sometimes threw her cards knowing she had the other card in her hand. but no she was really Good. Then after Go Fish we Colored. A coloring Book page. (agian i haven't done that since i was six). God really showed me that day that I can't communicate with Him as easily as I would like but He accepts me as I am. And he makes me lose sometimes. He doesn't try to let me win since i've lost for the past hour. He showed me that sometimes i have to look past The level of spiritual maturity i'm on and take a step down for a while. My spot is still there. Im still going to be able to do the big stuff later! But at that moment i just need to be a kid again. Lay there in the palm of His hand and just play Go Fish with Him. Give all my cards over to him. let Him color my picture. And Hand me the crayons.

this is extreamly long and im sorry for that. it really doesn't matter to me if you thought it was good or not.It was just to show off My God!.
<3

2006-07-31T12:01:00.000-04:00

So i look to You
So i look to You
No one else will do
No one else will do

This is Cinthia, Rosalind (her mother), and I...They live in the cadereyta which is a very poor part of town...Rosalind knew very little english so it was hard to talk to her!..I don't know her story very well but i would love to find out about it!..On the day of the all day outreach at the cadereyta Rosalind and cinthia invited Jen and i into her house and let us pray with her!...She is building a building in front of her house so she can start a little shop!..
..
Cinthia........what can i say about this beautiful girl...She was always very full of joy and it broke my heart to leave her...When i gave her a kiss on the cheek she didn't want her friends to be left out so she asked me by pointing if i could give them one too...

This is Hosea Emmanuel..This little guy touched my heart..He too lives in the cadereyta..The day of the food outreach he followed us all along the Road he lives on..The whole time he was holding my hand or asking to be held in my arms while he carried a bag of rice or beans for the next family..when we got to his house and asked his mother if there was anything we could pray about she said yes..He was having a surgery on his eye!...He is adorable

This is aramyeni AkA monkey girl...I met this girl at the VBS we held for all the kids from all of the Casa Hogar's and the cadereyta and the rio!..I have no idea where she lives or what her name really is (every time we asked he she would give us a different name)...but she's so cute!

Here she is again...everytime you pick her up all she wanted to do was flap around in your arms...spinning...falling backwards..flailing her arms!...Agh...i want to see her again!...
thats all for now!...

ill post a little bit of what we did and some other things later on this week before i leave for vacation...might just happen to put somemore pictures on if it lets me upload any more
<3

Mexico 2006.....Mucho Cheeto!!!!...

2006-07-30T00:24:00.000-04:00

Just got back from Mexico about 5 hours ago!..

What a week..It was hot, sweaty,miserable,wet,and tired...

But oh boy did I love EVERY single minute of it!..

It changed my whole perspective of poverty,wealth(and me not being wealthy..[explain more on this later])...I gained a whole new perspective on Kids, our team, my friends,our hearts, youth ministrie in action,Love in action, God in Action. I gained a new perspective on Grace and mercy and kindness,Love and Hope and Future!..I basically gained a whole new perspective on life!..Take a week out of your life and live like they did.

God worked in that city so much you could feel it getting off the plane!...God worked so much through us i don't even know what i would have done without his "glory strength"...God worked so much through the kids down there trying to get to us, My life is going to change...Right now!..

I dont know what it is im going to do yet...but its going to get done...

I still need to wrap my head around the simple fact that there are some kids there that i played with,. that i smiled at, that i handed out hot-dogs to, that God loved on through me that dont know where tomorrow's meal is coming from and are hungry cause trying to stretch the rice and beans God used us to bless them with didn't work as well as they thought it would!...

Be sad...because the situations that we faced were sad..Be sad because those kids, as happy as they were when we were playing with us, are crying them selves to sleep at night because their dad's are gone. or they have no food. or their 15-16 year old sister is pregnant and doesn't know what she is going to do with another mouth to feed

Be happy...be happy that God's will was done this week...That his hands and his feet were in constant motion and continue to be in motion, that He shook a city this week and he rattled a bunch of highschoolers...

But most of all Love God...because He is so much bigger than happy or sad...so much bigger than borders..or nationalities..He so much bigger than anything we could ever imagine and 30 of us realized that this week

<3

Camp Adventure 2006

2006-07-19T22:13:00.000-04:00

1 High ropes course

+1 Blob

+1 Corey

+1 johnny

+1 cup camp beautiful (oh yeah we won on the first and last day)

+105 students

+30 counselors

+22 songs (on communion night)

+1 frisbee

+2 ransom notes

+3 boys dressed like girls

+a dash of rain

+a hint of heat

+2 slip and slides

+200 pounds of food

+85 bribes

+7 gallons of detergent

+3 pairs of goggles

+2000 pictures

+25 hours of video

+12 volunteer cleaners,cookers and right hand women

+8 valley games

+a little bit of OOoooooooooooxxxxxxxxxxxxFffffforrrdddd

+some A- unit A unit

+a sprinkle of Suzanna

+1 amazing Senoir pastor

+2 more amazing youth pastors

+Angela Keim

+A pregnant Debbie Mann

+the Vurkomichs and The wagners

+5 little daughters

+Some tether ball

+some more beach volleyball

+ultimate frisbee

+Feeding the fish

+Tears

+Freindships

+worship

+ whole lot of God ::

=A wild week of Fun and Crazy Worshipping at camp adventure 2006

So many stories...

Ask me about it some time

Facts:::::

2006-07-06T12:12:00.000-04:00

This is to all my blogging friends out there...

please don't have a cow or a moose or any other type of animal that is large and not supposed to come out of a human...

I will be gone at camp for a few days starting on Sunday...That means no posting..

Just for Amanda my love i promise her a major post after camp...maybe with pictures...

or a video...

<3333333

(i have come to a realization... i love this certain person...[they shall remain nameless]..and i just can't get over them)

a quote and a conversation

2006-07-04T01:50:00.000-04:00

I am having the best conversation about this quote::

Life's deepest spritual lessons are learned by [god] making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are honestly able to say your will be done.

That is my mantra..

God::: Your will be done...

In EVERYTHING

XOXO

Here we Go again

2006-07-02T20:54:00.000-04:00

So here i am posting...

A month later than Amanda wanted me to..but posting nonetheless.

June was the craziest months i can ever remember..

Hung out with Garrett....ALOT...

got a lot of Sun...

And worked!...

July is going to be crazy..

..work..

\\camp//

[[work]]

++Mexico++

GOD= FEROCIOUSLY FANTABULOUS + The Official LOVE of my Life...
He has been a part of everything that i have done this summer...(excluding the TPing of jeremy Laws house)..
Giving me strength for work on those nights where i stayed up late..
Being a part of my Wednesdays..during bible study and then showing up when garrett and i hung out..
Coming up in Random conversations...
And blessing me enough so that i'm able to be a camp counselor and be a part of the Mexico Team..

He deserve's ALL the GLORY!

♥

X o X o

♥

Ahhhhhhhh.........

2006-06-05T19:39:00.000-04:00

School is almost over..

this summer is going to be AMAZING..

Wednesday's with Ruby and bible study @ starbucks...ahh i can't wait...

Thursday's at church...

Mexico...

Camp...

Garrett's here...

Shows...(chapel hill, solemn promise)

Sleeping in...

umm shot on friday (yuck!!)

The boat, a good pair of sunglasses, and a great tan...

I think i'm in <3 with this summer

<3

oh by the way does anybody ever get on these anymore?

Poetry

2006-05-22T10:57:00.000-04:00

My favorite poem:

If you were coming in the fall- Emily Dickinson

If you were coming in the fall,
I ’d brush the summer by
With half a smile and half a spurn,
As housewives do a fly.

If I could see you in a year,
I ’d wind the months in balls,
And put them each in separate drawers,
Until their time befalls.

If only centuries delayed,
I ’d count them on my hand,
Subtracting till my fingers dropped
Into Van Diemen’s land.

If certain, when this life was out,
That yours and mine should be,
I ’d toss it yonder like a rind,
And taste eternity.

But now, all ignorant of the length
Of time’s uncertain wing,
It goads me, like the goblin bee,
That will not state its sting.

<3

Corey told me last night that Whatever I do Do it for the Lord!! And since everything your doing is for the Lord do it 100%.. i really need to work on that especially when i'm working for my mom or when i'm babysitting or even school because now i do just enough to get me by and for God thats not enough...I also learned that anything can happen with just a an If You Can amount of Faith... And that all God wants from us is to be Authentic

Dont let your Passion become your purpose

I have Brilliance inside of me!!

Random

2006-05-19T10:27:00.000-04:00

I Found this great Poem!!

Rain - Shel Silverstein
I opened my eyes
And looked up at the rain
And it dripped in my head
And flowed into my brain
And all that I hear as I lie in my bed
Is the slishity-slosh of the rain in my head

I step very softly
I walk very slow
I can't do a handstand-
I might overflow,
So pardon the wild crazy thing i just said
I just havent been the same since there's rain in my head

<3

Rain

2006-05-11T16:27:00.002-04:00

Today was rain! There's not much else to say about it except: rain. The past couple of weeks have been really busy. Last night I actually got to relax and hang out at Oasis. Xanga not running yet because their fixing something and since Amanda will probably yell at me soon for not posting so I decided to post. And that Ladies and Gentlemen is about all I, Kasie, The loud one that sits in the Atrium almost every sunday, have to say. I hope all of you are doing swell!

Tomorrow i get to work and then Saturday is prom and bowling which i'm super stoked about! Only 2 more lifeline's remaining *Tear* And then its only 3 weeks left of school i think only 20 something days so i geuss that means 4 more weeks but soon it will be finals time.
<3

Rain

2006-05-11T16:27:00.001-04:00

Busy Busy ( this is my sorry)

2006-05-04T16:28:00.001-04:00

This is a sorry to all of my blogging friends (especially Amanda) For my lack of POSTage!! I've been really busy lately and the blog has just not been on my mind!! First thing: How are all of you doing? Is there anything I can pray for you about?

My life has been hectic and crazy and absolutely Amazing!! As i said in my last post i'm right where God needs me to be right now!! I have a part time Job in the summer plus babysitting..Starting this week I'm teaching in the Jungle room..I'm memorizing my bible and Realized that when your on a time crunch you can learn it a lot faster!! I just got nominated the VP of our Key Club... where we do various service and volunteer projects around the community! I am starting to do Five Star with my Amazing friend in Christ: Seth Maust...Little kids didn't seem like a place that i would want to be.. but as far as i can tell right now Little kids is where God wants me to be! Schools almost out for the summer and i'm struggling to keep focus but i'm doing alright...We just finished to Kill a MockingBird by Harper Lee and it is one of the greatest books in the world! Everything that i have all comes down to one person:God... My Love and my Savior! I wouldn't have any of this if I didn't have him First!!

Once God is first in your life.. and nothing else comes before Him.... Everything...im talking all the things that you want to Accomplish...Everything that you need...Most of the things you want..It all fits in..It all fits into the larger picture!Like Judy said last night: if Satan can't have you he'll keep you busy... But you know what since i have put God first i'm never too busy.. And all the things i'm busy with are serving Him.. Corey said on Sunday night that we need to start keeping each other accountable for the things we want to Accomplish!! So here are the things that i want to accomplish this year:

I want to start a program that helps underprivliged-inner city s get dresses, shoes, hair and makeup for prom.. because every desearves to feel beautiful in High School at least once!

I want to start coming to the second Sunday of every month thing and serve outside of the Church.. I want to get outside my comfort zone!

Theres more but those are the two main things that i want to focus on!!

<3

Finally! ~ ><> ~

2006-04-28T16:30:00.000-04:00

The centrifigal forces of school and chruch and homework ( not to mention my mother and her never-ending list of chores) have made it a bit hard to post. but thanks to the genius of Amanda, here I am posting. The Atlanta trip was Amazing and somewhat Life- altering. Its amazing to see that even homeless people who have nothing are more important than me. And the amazing girls and leaders i went down there with could not have served their Heavenly father in a more perfect way. Pictures will be coming soon and soon after that pictures of prom. I'm going with Tiffany burkett to Mishawaka's senior prom. Hilary and I decided to memorize Galatians so i'm working on that and its cool to have God's word racing through your head all day!!! I have little time to take a shower or even just relax and I have been slipping in my schoolwork but i am just getting back into the swing of things after spring break and Atlanta. the next 4 1/2 weeks i'm gunna have to bust butt to get things done.. Most of all though I feel Good...I feel i'm right where God wants me to be. In some places im still struggling but God is helping me sort them out !! I hope that your all doing Well and i cant wait to hear from you or see you!!

<3

Kasie*Marie

Someday we'll realize
All we ever wanted was
a chance to live our lives
A chance to learn and Love
If it all comes crashing down
young girl just dont give up
Put your faith in jesus
trust him to lift you up

GOD SIGHTING

2006-04-20T08:19:00.000-04:00

Last Saturday I sent my support letters out.. now last year i didn't send any support letters becuase i already had all the money i needed, So im quite new to this. Well yesterday my aunt calls my mom and was all excited about something and my mom had no idea what it was. So my aunt told her. She had just recieved my support letter in the mail and was almost moved to tears. Which is a God thing all in itself because my letters were good just not great.Yet the amazing thing was that yesterday in the mail she only got two envelopes. obviously one was my support letter, the other : her Tax check. If that isn't a God thing i don't know what is. I've always heard the stories of people always getting their money by an act of God but i never experienced it myself so I was excited but not too excited. Now I've first hand seen a miracle.

8 hours til' we leave for Ga. Im so excited I found out one of the girls in my eagles nest is going on the trip.. i have to pack and take a shower and do laundry. I'll write more when i get back...

*God*

You are undescribable you are so amazing Thank you so much for allowing me to go on this trip with such amazing young women. Lord your will this weekend God..I pray that whatever your plan is we accomplish it this weekend Lord that you give us no distractions... Your kingdom come Lord... God were so dependant on you for everything this weekend Lord I pray for the weather.. I pray we are all changed for this trip... Other people mattter Lord you proved that when Jesus died on the cross for us. .. help us show that this weekend.. help us show you and your grace and your glory... Its all to glorify you Lord... Help us change the hearts of the homeless..or just encourage them and give them hope lord. hope in you. Hope in your word. Hope in your Love. your amazing Love. help change our hearts and our mindset.. as you've already started working in mine...Lord i pray for my speech for... whatever you want to say through me God...go for it....USE ME...Use me to show these girls you and your purpose for them...and that they don't need to depend on boys to make them happy Lord they just need to lean on your Love.. In your awesome amazing indesribable name

AMEN

ATL

2006-04-18T18:35:00.000-04:00

If you've already read my xanga there's no need in reading the top part of this post (read the bottom though)...If you're Amanda be forewarned there ARE grammatical errors...my writing is usually very erroneous!!!

Only 2 more days until i get to go be gangsta and bring the light of Jesus into the lives of the homeless....All down in the ATL..with some AMAZING...thats right some Extraordinary middle school girls...

Last Friday we had a meeting for all the girls going on the trip..There we made "goodie" bags for all the kids...and "survival" bags for all the Adults...Were going to hand them out to the homeless on Friday night when were hanging out with Kurt Solerino and his church on the street ministry...And oh my goodness you should have seen these girls...we couldn't make bags fast enough...we couldn't get anything organized fast enough...and the two tables we had set out for all the "goodies" they were supposed to bring turned into three... These girls that we're going with have such awesome hearts.... before we started our meeting and started putting the bags together we all prayed...And I really think that these girls are going to be changed by this trip... because for them it's not going to be about a weekend...it's not going to be about them going to Georgia for the first time or the 5th...It's going to be about changing a homeless persons life...or learning under the teaching of Lori Solerino...it's going to become a life style...

Some of these girls had been at the church all day...Making easter baskets for the kids at the battered womens shelter...They have the heart of a servant..and Christ if definatly already living through them

~*~*~*wait even if you havent read a single word of this entire post READ THIS*~*~*~

Last night was probably one of the Coolest missions meetings i have ever been to in my entire time of being...We went to the retirement home across the street from the church with no inkling of what we were about to do...then for a little over an hour and a half we sat and talked to the "residents"...I could call them "old people"...yet after talking to them last night...they all have the hearts of a teenager..alot of them got to telling stories and it seemed like it wasn't them anymore it was their inner teenage being speaking through them..Ellen the 87 year old woman with Alzheimers i got acquainted with couldn't remember that she had ate dinner...yet she remembered that her mother came across the pacific in search of new life when she was 21 probably some 110 years ago. She remembered that she minored in French..yet remembered none of the langauge except for the fact that it was very peotic. She remembered her childhood growing up in Chicago and jumping off navy peir at a time when it was legal to jump off navy peir...And all she wanted was her freedom...she wanted to be let out of that place and fight once again for womens rights. She taught me alot in the short time that we were together...and Although i was a bit intimidated at first..then a bit reluctant to go talk to ellen because she was sitting by herself...I really enjoyed thinking of her as "more important than me"...Although she was Alone and didn't have very many friends or remember any of the people she knew...She was still more important than me and my fears...

And that ladies and gentlemen is my VERY*very*very long post.

Easter

2006-04-16T09:13:00.000-04:00

I saw a man yesterday on the side of the street. He had a sign that said. "No work.No Food.Have Kids. Help me please" It broke my heart. I of course wasn't driving. My mom was talking on the phone and she was already running late not planning on stopping for anyone. I said a prayer right there."God help this man. Help him know you. Put someone in his path." And I know it wasn't enough. As Christians were called to something greater. called to live a life different from those around us. So now after that I'm really excited about going down to Atlanta. There were going to be working with the homeless. we're going to be able to hang out and talk. get to know first hand what its like to be homeless.And I just pray that These 20 or 30 middle school girls going with us become Changed. Their hearts and their mindsets change. So if they see homeless on the side of the street they stop. And if they can't stop they say a little prayer for the person.I pray that it isn't just a weekend. It isn't just a little vacation with their friends. I pray that it becomes a lifestyle. That they take what they learn from the Homeless.From Kurt. from Lori. or even just from their friends on the ride down. And live it. In their schools and Communities.

Today is easter. 2005 (well 2033 thats what we decided at Jeremys) years ago Christ rose. He showed everyone that he was more than just a man who could do miracles. Bunnys are cool. But its awesome when your 6 year old cousin is talking about Christ while your coloring easter eggs.

Another thing I learned this week was that the students at Discovery Middle School were not allowed to carry around Bibles. Hilary and I decided that we were going to do something about it. So pray for us. Pray we won't give up. Pray that we get this changed. We have Christ with us. And thats enough to get it done.

Research Reports and Procrastination

2006-04-11T17:25:00.000-04:00

I dont know which is worse the research report.. that I just happened to lose on the bus today...or the fact that I had all spring break to do it and didn't... And now i have to start from scratch and finish it TONIGHT....This stupid report just put me over the edge... I just want to scream...I worked on it for an Hour and 45 minutes today....i got half of it done.. and I LOST it on the bus... uhh i wish that i could say that i was stupid but if i was stupid i wouldn't be doing this report in the first place...on a lighter note i found something from corey that i just wanted to share with all you

My prayer today is that the many Easter Displays that walk into any church this coming weekend will come to know that Jesus is worth displaying year round. He is the book you can't put down. It's in his display that you find the title of your book and supporting role that you have been offered to play. Actually, Jesus lets you write your line in the script too. But, he feeds you the line.....it is "Not I, but Christ." Well,...you do get to pick your favorite font.

I thought that was cool because thats how a lot of christians are today...

I've been thinking about what Corey said on sunday and have been trying to apply it to my life... I could say that putting people first has made me happier...yet right now i don't feel very happy at all... But before i lost my report...I was truly happier.. plus the weathers nice and nice weather makes everything seem better....

At least I have OASIS to look forward to tommarow...

I HAVE to go write a research report now...and take a shower and cook dinner and do my math and biology homework...I'll be up till midnight!! because that sounds like fun...i can't believe it.. oh well next weekend ill be in Atlanta...hanging with Hil and all my middle school friends and listening to Laurie (spelling) Solerno...
<3
Kasie*Marie

Indy

2006-04-08T07:49:00.000-04:00

The end of my spring break is fast approaching.. And Today I get to go to Indy to pick up my little brother from the airport. It should be fun. Considering Im going to be with my parents all day...In a car. Well my blogging friends its time to hit the road. At 8 oclock in the morning.

Change the World for Him

2006-04-05T21:12:00.000-04:00

I just realized that I need to appreciate what i have more. Last week at Oasis as the band was playing I was complaining about how Mike wasn't like Trace. Not that he was better or worse just that he wasn't Trace. That's a GOOD thing. I'm glad they're not like each other. If they were i think Worship in Middle school would have been different. Much Different. And i was complaining about it.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Sometimes I start to think about how small our church is compared to other churches. Yet our church is WAY bigger than MOST of the churches out there. And i should at least be thankful that I have a church to worship in. At least I live in a country that lets me worship where, when, and how I want. At least i have a country that accepts me for who i am and doesn't commdemn me for my religious beliefs.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Satan puts these stupid little lies into my head. Pushing me away from God. Telling me that my God, the one who created the cosmos, isn't big enough for me or my problems. That my Church isn't Big enough -or- cool enough -or- Godly enough for me.

*~*~*~*~*~*

But my God is God of Gods, Lord of Lords, The great God mighty and awesome. He is also a very Jealous God. Jealous of how much control has over my life. Yet I know even though Satan has a little control over my life God has me in the palm of His hand.

*~*~*~*~*~*

He's going to USE me. He's going to change my life. He's going to USE me to change other people's lives.

*~*~*~*~*~*

So my prayer tonight:

That I try not to let Satans stupid lies take control of my life and make me think any less of my God. And that God would just Use me and the talents he has given me to change the World. I don't think I could be satisfied changing just my community. I have the Hand of God helping me in all I do. I have the Mighty, Awesome Father encouraging me all along the Way. Anything less than changing the world just isn't good enough.

*~*~*~*~*

Oh by the way i have decided that i am officially addicted to the computer so...i am fasting tomarrow...from the computer..so all my poor blogging friends. no random post. or mid-day ministy for you. Just me and my bible, support letters, and a Walk to Remember.

CHICAGO

2006-04-04T10:01:00.000-04:00

This weekend was Crazy. With a capitol C. Friday I went to the "all about you" volunteer celebration at the church. It was Beautiful. I get there and all the Staff is standing outside clapping for me and taking pictures of me and I have to walk down the "red" carpet. I walked inside and there was this huge grand piano that they rented and Jason was vamping on it for a little ambiance music. We hung out for a little bit(you're gay, you're gay).We go inside the Auditorium and the staff puts on a little show for us which had a major SNL theme. At the end the let balloons go for us and we sang a couple of songs. Afterward Jermey, Patrick, Jimmy, Hilary, Alena, Jeanna, and I went to Coldstone after chasing Jeremy for 15 minutes (run, faster faster, except I'm driving)Then we went back to Laws house. I had a little issue over Him not flusing his toilet and then we left. Hilary and Moi went to bed and then got up at 6 to go to work. Hilarys mom walks outside and finds a Toilet on the front porch. Thanks Law. After work we went to Laura's House and Helped set up for the party. Then we had the Party. Hilary spoke. We had a bonnett contest. we played BINGO. Then we went to church becuase Hilary was teaching. We went home and went to bed well hilary did (are you OK? yes. When are you going to quit coughing so I can go to sleep?)by the way im the one in Italics Hil is in Bold. Sunday Went to church. Then went Shopping. Matt called from Hawaii. bought an outfit. Then went to Judy's house for Ashlee's going away party. Stayed there til like 2 ( yes in the morning) and went home and went straight to bed. This is where the real fun comes in. Got up at 9:30 and decided to leave at ten thirty for Chicago. (ashlee needed to go to the Japanese consulate so that she could get her Visa). Got 45 minutes there and she realized she forgot the most important paper yay. SO we turned around and went back to Niles. Got the paper. And headed back to Chicago. Got there at about three Indiana time. went to the Consulate. Which was in Neiman Marcus. Got her Visa which took all of 15 minutes and went Shopping. We shopped at H&M for about an Hour then decided we were hungry. So we went to this little corner bakery thing and got food. Then started on our journey home. Got right outside of Chicago and realized that we were headed to Wisconsin not Indiana. So we had to turn around for the 2nd time in our journey. Finally got through Chicago again but on the right side and got on the wrong road. Turn around number 3. made it on the right road but they were doing major construction. Missed our Exit 2ce. turn around numbers Three and Four. To put a long story short we were planning on getting home aroung 6 didnt get home until around 9 or 9:15. It was a great day. Then i went to bed. Got a lot of stuff to do today. like passport pictures being taken and research report to write.

Kasie*Marie

The smell of spring

2006-03-31T16:50:00.000-05:00

Ahh the smell of spring.. the smell of rain....I love spring...its my favorite time of the year... My favorite weather.. my favorite holiday...Easter... and its when school lets out for summer...

spring brings life...thats probably why God had Jesus die for us in the spring..Cause Jesus brings life to us just as spring brings life to vegatation...

I saw two very amazing things today. One was a rainbow. but the other one was way cooler. I saw the sun shining down on me even though it was pouring down rain. It's probably not that uncommon in fact I seen that happen last year on the Tennessee trip but I didn't really recognize the symbolism behind it.It kind of showed me that even when your having a really rough time don't neglect to search for the good that comes out of it or the little Joys you experience. I know that so often i get caught up in my own problems that i don't share the Joy i feel when someone else has something good happen to them. Or im so caught up and bitter about the situation that if something good happens to me i automatically take if for granted and put it in the back of my mind.

Ephesians 2:8 For it is by Grace you have been saved through faith- and this is not from yourselves, it is a gift of Gods..

Kasie*Marie

Gilmore Girls and my two best friends

2006-03-30T13:26:00.000-05:00

One day until spring break...Yay... Can't wait... Friday night Hilary and Moi are going to the all about you event at church. Afterwards Jeremy Law is talking the Bible Study leaders out to go hang. Hopefully we wont get home that late and Hilary and I can have some much needed alone time just to talk. It's been awhile since we've actually been together without anyone here. Saturday were getting up and Heading over to Laura's house for a cute little spring fling for all the women leaders. No Diapers.No testosterone. Just chocolate, Bonnets and Bingo. After were heading to Church. Hilary gets to teach and her Love is going to be there. i gotta go support my girl. Then more chick time. I'll probably call Garrett sometime in the Midst of all of that cause we haven't had a good talk in a while. Sunday Hil has to teach again. And i'm kinda bummed because i'll have no one to hang out with because Matt is going to be in Hawaii.. Lucky... Ashlee is picking us up after church to have our bible study.. the last one *TEAR* for a whole year... we get to eat Turtles. they better be good and the kid that sold them to us better go far in that basketball tournament. We are going to give her our gift. Sorry you can't know what it is its classified information. Monday hopefully I can go with my mom to work to earn a little cash and then she can take me to the mall to buy some much needed jeans. after work she can take me to Jeremy's house for bible study. Tuesday I'm not doing anything at all. Oh wait yes i am i'm SLEEPING the whole day don't call me or awake me. Wed. i thought i was getting my permit but i can't *tear* so i get my Passport instead (for MEXICO) yay... then i have to go to the dentist. Thursday is the day that ashlee is leaving so an All day Gilmore Girls Marathon is called into order along with some major crying and a good pint of Ben and Jerry's Friday i have to write a research paper. Oh what Fun. then pick my brother up from INDY on Sat.

Kasie*Marie
P.s sorry for such a long post.

Words to live by

2006-03-28T16:46:00.000-05:00

" 'Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we subconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we're liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
-- From A RETURN TO LOVE by Marianne Williamson

Matthew 5:16
In the same way let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your father in heaven

God tells us to let our light "shine" so that they may see him. Sometimes I get frustrated and I can't find purpose for my life. Sometimes I get upset because worship is my light and there are things that God doesn't allow me to do because I am a sinner and I'm prideful and God knows that at this point in time I won't honor Him. Which is all I want to do. That's all I want my life to be for. I know that I have to die every day to live for Him. God created us for a purpose. He didn't create us just so that we could take up space, breathe up all the air, and eat all the food. Why let your life boil down to dragging through school.He gave us a brain .Why not use it? Coming home and laying on the couch watching T.V. He gave us the World Why not roam it? And sleep walking day by day doing our useless routines and boring chores. We need to Wake up. Get moving. Show people that God is in us and not necessarily that God is in us But that we are a part of God. Part of the bigger story. I know that my purpose in life is to do something AMAZING. As is for Your life. Our God is God of Gods, Lord of Lords, the great God, mighty and Awesome(Deut. 10: 17), so do you seriously think that He created us for the monotonous lives we're living?

Black Tuesday and the New deal

2006-03-28T13:11:00.000-05:00

So right now I'm at school. Were supposed to be reseaching a topic for our great depression research reports.. Yet I'm already finished with research cause that's the way I roll. My Tuesday has got off to a shaky start. I still don't feel good and My mom and Brother were arguing today. The only thing I have to look forward to is Hilary's this weekend. Its going to be fun. Oh yeah and the fact that its supposed to be 65 on Thursday. Yesterday night I found out that I'm not getting the two babysitting jobs I was supposed to have so I get no money for spring break but that's okay cause my moms taking me to get my permit next week and possibly for a driving lesson or two. Like I said I'm doing this research report and its due after spring break. So I guess that's what ill be doing Monday and Tuesday. Got my room cleaned last night. Like amazingly clean. My grandmother would probably cry if she came over right now. So I made a deal with my mother. I would keep my room at least this clean until the Atlanta trip if she gave me 20 bucks to spend in Atlanta. She had so little faith in me she said sure under the condition that if I don't keep it clean I have to spend a WHOLE Saturday cleaning the house. UMM doesn't sound fun for me. The bell is about to ring my loves.

Whoremonger = ?

2006-03-27T16:02:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was alot of fun. very tiring but very fun. Sat. I got to church at like 4:30 to dance. So i danced. then me and candace decided we wanted to do something so Ryan said that we could come over. i called my mom and told her and said that I was going to spend at candace's house. So long night short Candace and I were up until 4 oclock just to get up at 7 to go back to church and dance somemore. Went to Starbucks with Ashlee shes moving in almost a week *tear* then went back to church to see this guy>>>> Craig Gross the guy from xxxchurch.com.. It was great.. He was awesome. and J Aquila did an amazing job on singing "dirty little secret " then we hung out for a while and came home.. nothing really that exciting. spring break in less than 5 days. i'm so excited yet everyone is going some where except me.. well my brother and james are anyways.. I get to stay in Indiana.. yay at least the weather might be fairly decent. So i get to miss the first night of the five series at lifeline cause i'll be in Atlanta but its okay. i am actually going to go clean my room can you believe it? good cause i can't either. I will talk to you all later.. or maybe sooner for those of you that are cool.. well you're all cool some are just cooler than others..or fatter(hilary)

Kasie*Marie

oh by the way what is a Whoremonger?

First Official Post

2006-03-25T10:01:00.000-05:00

So today it is 10:01 in the morning and i have a hour to get ready... for a hair cut... im so excited i get to dance downstairs tonight... I get the see chloe and mason.. oh i love those kids...I get to see hil tommarow at Lifeline and i'm so excited... Craig Gross from xxx church is going to be there...i can't believe only 5 more Lifelines until the end of the school year.. Spring break is coming up quick and im so ready for it lay out in the sun and get tan... hopefully its not 30 degrees but it probably will be..

Live. Laugh. Love
Kasie*Marie

AHH BLOGSPOT

2006-03-25T08:54:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone... i have finnally succombed to the Blogging realm... well the blogspot blogging realm that is... actually i was just getting upset that i couldn't comment on anyones blogs... Comment me or i could comment you...